Wednesday, October 24, 2012

The 5 Stages of Natural Hair Acceptance

The twist out works for me but I don't work for it
Returning to natural hair is a change and like any other change, there are stages we may go through before getting it right. Some of us may skip stages while others stay in one stage for a very long time.

At the beginning of our transition or right before the BC, we tend to be excited. I know I was. Each day I knew that I was growing closer and closer to having a full head of natural hair. I nearly drooled thinking of all of the styles I would wear with my new hair.

Then, reality sets in. This can be positive or negative. Some are shocked that their hair has a pattern as they did not expect one. Others are shocked because they have a tighter curl pattern than what they expected or that their hair doesn't look like someone else's. I was shocked at how un-cookie cutter my hair texture was. I had prepared for all types--expecting to have just one, but what I got was a mixed bag of nuts that continues to change with time.

In this stage, a person may be in denial about their hair's appearance. They may think "It just needs time to grow in and change" or "I'm just not using the right products to get it to look like so and so's hair". In this stage we want our hair to do things that it may not even be meant to do and we keep trying!

I remember obsession all too well. In this stage we do find out what our hair will do and what it loves and then we seek to perfect it. I found that my hair loved twist outs and I kept trying all sorts of things to perfect my twists and twist outs. I have seen the same thing in people who do wash and gos, braid outs, etc.

At this stage it is what it is. We no longer seek to top our last twist out, we know that our hair is unique to us, we have a set routine and rarely splurge on trying products. Our natural is our norm.


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